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Wasting My Summer: The M&M Racer Edition

May 31, 2010

By Tom Price

When you think about M&Ms, your the first thought might be yummy candies, or that weird Christmas commercial with Santa, or the rise of childhood obesity. Maybe even that one time you caught an M&M in your mouth when your friend threw it across the room.  All great memories.  I don’t assume to know what you do with your food, or what it makes you think of, but I would wager a hefty sum that one of the last things M&Ms make you think of is kart racing.   Which is why it’s such a natural fit (Right…?). So here it is, the only game that melts in your mouth, not in your hands (Well, I can only promise it won’t melt in your hands), M&M Kart Racing. What follows is a list of all the interesting things I learned about M&Ms during my time with the game.

  1. M&Ms don’t have any peripheral vision. I found this out while trying to make a simple turn. The camera doesn’t pivot to show what you’re turning into. It’s like driving with blinders on. Imagine driving without being able to turn your head, and is made even worse because many of the tracks are very narrow. The game demands precise driving that’s impossible to achieve, not just due to the camera but also because the controls are imprecise. Oh, how I wished the game allowed me to switch to d-pad controls, instead of constantly seesawing the Wii remote into something that resembled control.

    This may or may not be the DS version. I honestly can't tell

  2. Not all M&Ms are created equal. Ok, you can play as the sexy Green M&M, or the cool Blue M&M (You can tell he’s cool because he wears sunglasses). You can also play as the Orange M&M, which apparently is the misfit M&M. And of course the Yellow and the Red M&M, who is wearing a sombrero for some reason. But you cannot play as the Brown M&M. I know that the Brown M&M hasn’t ever been a character, but not including him just means that the developers had to stretch for characters.  That’s how the game ended up with a fox, robot and cricket as other unplayable characters. If anyone knows what these things have to do with M&Ms please let me know. Perhaps breaking the M&M canon and adding in the Brown M&M would have been better.
  3. M&Ms are pacifist. Half the fun of kart games comes from the different upgrades and weapons you get.  However, if developers aren’t careful you can end up with an over powered blue shell situation. Well M&M Kart Racing decided to bypass this issue by just not adding in weapons. Which is a shame, think of all the amazing chocolate based weapons there could have been. Chocolate oil slicks, trapping other racers in a candy wrapper, or a mouth that takes a bite out of your opponents. Although I admit that last one might be an issue with the fox, robot and cricket.

There are a number of other issues with this game. The majority of tracks are extremely dull. Sometimes you’ll crash into a something like a tree and get stopped, and other times you’ll pass right through it. It was a terrible experience from start to finish.  However,  it did get me excited for the potential sequel: Eminem Kart Racing.

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